The Royal Court

Rumors go that cat nobility is living in this house. Of course they are right.
Not so right is that Mom thought it would be funny to put a crown on Esme's head while my little sister is sleeping in her bed and can't defend herself.
I would have had to take measurements if she had tried the same with me. I don't need a crown, my behavior speaks for me.

At least it's just a photo editor crown and not like what she did to Esme when she was still an innocent babe, almost exactly eight years ago (these are scrunchies she put over her ears, no respect, that woman!).

P.S. I was so shocked that I actually forgot to log in to my own account this time!!

Time flies

"Einszweidrei! im Sauseschritt, läuft die Zeit; wir laufen mit." That's what the German humorist Wilhelm Busch said in 1877, translated that could be "One-two-three, in hasty race, time is running, we keep pace." as I found elsewhere.

These pictures of my sister and me were taken merely eight years (seven years, ten months, two weeks and three days if you want the exact time) ago.
We had invaded the household not long before that and captured hearts immediately. How could we not, just look at us! Are we adorable in this picture or are we ADORABLE? I'm the taller one, by the way. The picture was taken when we were sitting at the second floor window that became one of our favorite spots because pigeons liked to fly close by. When we grew older, we felt they did it on purpose to taunt us. Even though Mom agreed on that, we couldn't convince her to take the cat net off the window. 

These pictures were taken two days ago. We might have changed since then. Just a tiny teensy bit. We both grew, we both gained some weight, but we didn't lose our curiosity. That time we were looking out of the side window on the first floor (the second floor has been lost to us for quite some time now, but that's ok, we could handle that amazingly fast, much to Mom's joy and relief), and it was 5 am. Outside doesn't just look dark because it was obviously dark, but also because the house there is under construction at the moment which means lots of scaffolds, plastic covers and stuff.

 Boy, we sure had some fun in these eight years.

It's been a hard day's night

Or maybe it has been a hard night's day. Or a hard morning's afternoon. Or maybe a cat's hard life's break?
Poor little sister. Mom should be ashamed of herself, making Esme work like a dog. A cat should never have to work like a dog.

It started with having to wake up Mom. Cats do not have a snooze button, and still we keep coming back, playing every dirty trick in the house. Not because we want to, but because we have to. Can't we be hungry, only because it's 4 am in the morning? At least today she gave in at 6 ... but then we didn't like the food. Esme is close to starving anyway, can't you tell? Shame on you, Mom.

As our human is not ready or able to learn, we had to repeat the protests at 11 am, 2 pm, 4 pm and 6.45 pm. Esme is invaluable during these actions, not only because she can use her most annoying voice, the one that goes like a drill right into a human's brain, but also because she definitely is the expert headbutter in this house. She has the neck of a full grown bull and she's not afraid to use that head.
She also uses it to help let out Buster, to try and knock the laptop off the desk when more important things need to be done (like feeding or brushing or feeding ... did I mention feeding?).

Of course in between there are the little tasks like getting into Mom's way and almost make her trip, walk on her ribs - which always works best when she wants to sleep - everyday stuff like that.

It can wear the toughest cat out.

You've got a friend

Hum along if you know the song while reading another tale of crime, catastrophes and friendship.

Let's start with the catastrophes. Both Mom and I have been terribly lazy bloggers lately. There are several things that kept us - lack of motivation, laziness and general headdesking (is that a word?).
To be open about it, Mom was the one who mostly did the last one while I supervised it to make sure she didn't put any big dents in one of my favorite napping spots.
I'll spare you the whole story of blocked sinks, pipe cleaning guys, water under the sink, home remedies, plumber cracks, lying around on the kitchen floor, using up a lot of kitchen roll ... let me just say we knock on as much wood as we can find to make sure that is over now. Meffi is tired of having to vacate her kitchen spots, Esme is tired of having to hide under the duvet while Greebo is sitting under the bed ... and I'm tired of Mom whining. If someone is allowed to whine here, it's me, if only because it's fun to drive Mom nuts while she is trying to find out what I want, hehe.

And now to the crime section. All I'll say is Swedish chicken and a hungry cow cat. When will Mom learn to put the complete food order away? She got up because she suspected Buster was nibbling on the last box in his room, instead she found Greebo in the box outside of Buster's room.
The funny part about it is that from that moment on Greebo has been refusing to touch the Swedish chicken mostly.

You know that Buster is free to run again, do you? The cage you see in the picture is just the place where he has his food, water, some of his toys and the spot where he can read his morning paper, ehem. He really seems to love his room, and we visit him a lot, even Meffi has taken up the habit to stay with him.
If you need proof of a beautiful friendship, here it is - Esme, Buster and Greebo.
Unfortunately Mom was too slow to get the camera and I still have that opposable thumb problem meaning I don't have one. If she was quicker, you would have seen pictures of Buster trying to get up on Esme's back. It was adorable, I guess. At least I Mom said awwww a lot.

See you around soon for this month's JAC blog ring, and who knows, maybe I'll share some pictures with you before that. I do have a load in my special cat folder that need editing.
Have a good time until then!

Kitty cats

My my, aren't we a handsome lot?
This is the collage Mom and her sister are using for a card to send to one of their vets who moved away. They didn't get the chance to say goodbye themselves, so they let us do it.
Much better than using pictures of themselves, don't you think?

P.S. Mom said she'd make one resolution for the new year, by the way. She wants to ban the words "Stop that now" from her vocabulary. I wonder if we can make a deal that each time she says it she has to give me a treat or something. I'm quite I'd be rich!

My little sister

Mom keeps telling me that Esme is adorable. You know something?
She is.

The yellow ball

In April Mom wrote a post about Esme and her yellow ball which was her favorite toy at that time. The little yellow knobbly ball has come back with a vengeance over the last few days. I think Esme is in training for some Cat Olympics, I just wonder why they didn't invite me?

Yes, I admit it, I am a bit dazzled by this development and so is Mom. Not long and she will start shaking and getting a tic in her eyelid when she hears that familiar thunk thunk telling us the ball is in action again.

Why it has to be the yellow one? No one knows. All I can say is that when it hid under the bed for a few hours, its orange pal jumped in and got fetched exactly twice before it was forgotten again. Don't even ask about the neglected blue one.
Yeah, right. I said "fetched". Greebo and I do it from time to time, but we have become rather lazy in that regard lately. Now Esme is getting really good at it. If fetching is a good thing for a cat, that is. The jury is still out on that.

Can you believe that she even brings that thing and drops it on Mom's desk? In April there was not getting a photo proof of that, but today - after many, many, many pathetic shots - you'll get it exclusively on my blog!

Uh-oh, there's the thunk thunk again ........

Black Cats Appreciation Day

Go ahead. Appreciate us all you can, but we need a nap. It's hard work being adorable all the time.
(Which is why he has been spending almost all day like this today!! "Mom")

Esme prefers to not even be seen.

Rag rugs

The other day Mom got out the rag rugs for us. The old carpet had had to go and because she's concerned about our delicate little furry selfs, she thought we needed some more bedding. I wonder when she'll find a Flokati somewhere.

That's pretty funny because we like our "Sea of Boxes", but hey, if it makes her feel better.
It's not as if we don't use them at all. I don't have a picture of Greebo at hand, but here's my queen smartly camouflaged in stripes on stripes (believe me, Mom actually didn't see her the other day and did a great jump off her chair when Meffi suddenly moved).

And here am I, working hard as always. I wish I had a rag rug all in black.

As harmless as rag rugs may seem however is it a little known fact that they often serve as hideouts for dangerous and terrifying creatures.
See for yourself. One moment just a colorful home accessory ....

..... the next moment you face the ice cold killer vampire witch cat!!!

I want to believe

Sasquatch, Nessie, Bigfoot, Yeti, The Beast of Bodmin Moor, Jersey Devil, Chupacabra, aliens... you name the cryptid, monster or extraterrestial and Mom believes in it.
Of course I know that humans are not as smart as us felines, but whenever I try to explain to her that she shouldn't be so gullible for everything, she just laughs and tells me "I want to believe". Well, did she bring Nessie home from Scotland when she was there on vacation? After she kept telling me that she would be the one to see her if she could only go to Loch Ness?

The other day she topped herself, however. She showed me the following pictures as proof for a cryptid living in our very own house ...

I guess that proves it.
The mysterious monster in our house is my very own sister Esme walking across what we call "The Sea of Boxes" here!

The Dell box

Mom didn't think this box was interesting at all, flat and boring as it is, but what do humans know?
Often when she is sitting at the computer now, she hears a noise and with all the packed boxes around that Greebo so likes to use as scratching posts, her instinct kicks in and she yells "Stop it!!" Then she turns around and apologizes to whatever cat just took its seat in the "boring" box.

Usually it's Esme. She loves that thing, can you tell?
She can hold hands with her wooden buddy and tell him about her day, maybe her wishes and dreams and how much the food has been sucking again in this house lately (don't let her sweet little belly distract you from the fact that she's very much malnourished, starving, neglected and has to work so much around here).
I can imagine her saying "You are so lucky, my friend. You don't need food. You don't need snuggles and love at 3 in the morning. It's not easy for a kitty like me."

And sometimes, if I have been really good to her, she lets me sit in there, too. (Yeah, so I AM an attention whore and have problems to blog without including a picture of my gorgeousness! Deal with it!)

The tiger(s) and the panther

Right at this moment a tiger girl is sleeping under Dad's desk. It's amazing, suddenly Meffi is hanging out up here all the time. Of course that means Esme lost one of her favorite sleeping spots, but she prefers the bed much more these days anyway.
It also means I get growled at a lot more often, but that's a side effect I gladly accept if it means my goddess is near me. I keep staring at her because I still can't believe it.

Last night she refreshed her acquaintance with her big friend, Mr. Big Tiger.

I'll tell you something. Panthers shouldn't interfere when tigers have a chat. Can you tell by Meffi's look?

"Maybe the laser eyes do the trick. Don't mess with me, Esme, or you'll regret it."

My sister doesn't give up that easily. It's a family trait. We call it perseverance, Mom calls it annoying.
No one tries to mess with Meffi for long, though. Usually she is the one with a tail fluffed up to look bigger than her whole tiny body, roaring like a fiend from the underworld, chasing us.
Esme gave in. Naturally.

(Mom says that Meffi wasn't growling, but biting Mr. Big Tiger's whiskers She also told me that she is tired of us molesting the poor guy and that she can't understand why we are all so obsessed with those whiskers. Well, she's only human, poor creature. How could she understand?)

Memories

Yesterday we had a blood bath here. No worries, everyone is ok. It was an accident. During a little fight Meffi's ear was punctured. Mom has her experiences with that from when she took blood from Merlin's ear to check his blood sugar. That was a blood bath as well sometimes.
Only she didn't know this time it was the ear because Meffi shook her head all over the place which means there were spots of blood everywhere (including the wallpaper and the Steiff lamb's leg, oops).
Meffi got some of the infamous herbal cream put on her ear and things were ok again.

This inspired Mom to pull up some of the old pictures to show us how much friendlier we used to be with each other. It's true, those cuddly times have gone. Not that we don't snuggle anymore, but not as long as we used to. She still thinks it was Merlin's good influence and she's probably right.
Wanna see what she's talking about?

Merlin, Greebo and me - are we adorable or what?

Merlin and  Greebo

Merlin cleaning me

Esme and me - much younger then (can you believe we'll be 7 this year??)

Greebo and me

Gandalf and Greebo

And of course the lovebirds Merlin and Meffi

This was before Esme and I came along (a long time ago, just look at that video cassette on the floor!) when Mom had her first incredibly expensive and pretty lousy digital camera

Of course there are more pictures, but you know how it is when old people tell their stories "When I was young, I had to walk to school in 4 feet of snow, barefoot, 15 miles only on a piece of bread for the whole day" ... we just walked off and let her ramble ;-)

Happy Used Year!

I'm sorry for not saying Happy New Year. It's not that new anymore now. I have to admit I'm responsible for one or the other chip coming off already and so are my friends.
What have we been up to, let me think.

Meffi was being a good girl, I don't have a picture of her right now. Maybe I should say she's too smart to not escape the camera. She wasn't that good when she slapped me today. Be assured that I was being a gentleman, so there was no reason for that.

Greebo is as relaxed as always ... as long as the kitchen doesn't close in this house. He really checks out everything for edibility. I'm surprised he didn't try to eat the furniture yet!

Little sister Esme is practising being a watchcat and pursuing her goal to keep Mom off the computer.

 

I'm busy, busy, busy. It's not easy being the boss.
You have to explore places (why are all the cabinets etc. always locked up here??) ...

... you have to always be on top of things (this box is empty!) ...

... lay low and watch ...

... and sometimes take measurements to keep people from telling secrets (even little vinyl ones)!

There's a new box in town

And it's a great one! It hasn't made its way downstairs yet, so I don't know if Meffi will like it (hm, do you think I should give it to her for Christmas?) and Greebo hasn't tried it yet as he prefers the bed at the moment, but Esme and I for once agree ... it's great!
You can use it both ways as you can see and you can either just sit on it or have a nice grooming session in it.

This is when it came out of the "Vertiko" (not a typo, I don't mean vertigo, this is a piece of furniture) that I love so much that I am constantly trying to get in there. I just knew there was some good stuff in it!
Let me show you a few pictures.

Mom cleaned out the Vertiko from paper stuff and I helped.

You can lie or sit, nothing like a flexible piece of cat box furniture.

Sit on the lid, sit in the box, the butt feeling is definitely different. Believe an expert.

Esme being slightly smaller than me (not talking about her belly, hehe) prefers to use all of the lid.

Bendy Esme! This resulted in a big sigh from Mom who wishes she could even touch her toes when standing. Humans, when will they understand we are so much more talented than they are?

You want to know what else is new in Ponder's Kingdom?

Well, as you can see I am always ready to nip insubordination in the bud (or in the butt in this case!). Esme is just as curious as I am, but sorry, girl, this is MINE! There's no picture of it, but right the next second I had a good pounce at her, she gave me a good hiss and growl and we rolled around on the floor for a bit. The picture came out blurry and before Mom could set her camera to video, it was all over already.

Here you have proof of attempted murder. Mom was glad that Esme (yup, not me, I swear) did this during the day. And while I usually get up (96 % of all times that I'm in the way on the stairs), Esme didn't budge. She's really funny since she's on drugs and makes her people wonder a lot if they really got the right cat back at the vet's. She still takes her pills without much of a problem, she started to like being picked up and snuggled, but there's one thing that hasn't changed ... yesterday Mom starting whistling without noticing herself. She sure did notice when Esme came running into the room yelling as if someone was trying to take her catnip toy! Esme could hardly calm down for a while after Mom stopped. I know she's not much of a whistler, but wow, what a reaction!
Oh, by the way, the murder attempt came before the whistling ;-)

Next I'll show you a Christmas miracle. Meffi made her way upstairs once again! Isn't she just adorable? I really, really wish ... maybe Santa Claus can do something for me ... I love her so much, even when she's hissing at me like a madcat ...

She did NOT freak out when Esme went by her. Sheesh.

You are pretty much up-to-date now, just one last picture. Let me show you what to do if you really, really had enough (of whatever).
I saw Mom peeking at the Santa Claus hat, I think I'll practise that look a bit more now.