Cats and Christmas as in ME and Christmas

I like Christmas. Seriously, I do. Mom gets us some special treats, her friend always sends us something and since last year we even have a Christmas tree again. I had never seen a Christmas tree before. When Esme and I came into the family it was summer. Until winter it had been decided that around us - which was just the polite way to say "around me" - a tree would be too dangerous.
Mom even admits openly that she thinks pictures of fallen Christmas trees are funny as long as it is not her own.
Well, last year she bought a small artificial tree to give us - as in "me" - a chance to behave. Of course I was good. I only stole two of her handmade weirdly colored pineapple slices - she calls them her stars, but where are the points? - and they were easy to put back. I haven't decided yet what I'll do with the tree this year.

Yes, it's up already, with those nice bouncy wire crochet balls - I have stolen them before, too - and the pineapple slices, and of course Jack on the top.
Today was all about Christmas, even more than the last weeks. If you have wondered why I haven't blogged in more than a month, well, I simply didn't get a chance! Mom is having an advent calendar on her blog, and she has been preparing it forever and still isn't done. She's doing research and page hopping and she listens to Christmas carols and songs and she even took up the challenge of baking without the planet breaking apart!!
Well, and today she turned on Smooth Christmas Radio and finished a blog post, then she got inspired to set up the Christmas tree, she (finally) made the final draft of the Christmas gift list - why aren't we on there? - and ordered things. We all took turns on her lap, so it was a rather pleasant day which was topped by the fact that she gave us treats to eat instead of the regular food.

It had been my turn on her lap when Santa Baby was next on the radio. She got up, held me tight and then she started singing AND dancing with me. Who took my Mom and who is this weird lady?
Okay, it wasn't that bad. She held me really tight and kissed my ear and I was purring all the song through. It's probably one of those brainwash songs.
I was seriously worn out when we were done, though. Christmas is hard work!

P.S. Can you see it? Pineapples, right??

Halloween

"Hey Ponder, do you want to write something for Halloween?"
"Why should I?"
"For the JAC blog carnival."
"Oh, that still exists?"
"Of course it does, we only took a little break. You can write about Samhain, Halloween or Dia de los Muertos."
"I don't even know how to pronounce Samhain. Halloween. Hm. Let me think about it."

This was a talk between Mom and me a few days ago.
Halloween ... what does it mean to me? Even if I wasn't an inside cat, Mom wouldn't let me go out on Halloween. Or Esme, for that matter. While the day is associated with witches and black cats, black cats are not safe out there at that time. There are too many crazy people out there.
Sometimes Mom asks me if I would sit on her shoulder and stay there if she dressed up as a witch. Yeah, right. I don't even want to think about her nagging if I have to hold on to her with my claws out. Just today she shooed Esme off her lap yelling that her knees were pierced now.

What else is there on Halloween? Treats. What are we supposed to do with chocolate we can't eat or candy apples we don't want? We are not even allowed to scare anyone!
Nevertheless I have to admit I do get Halloween feelings. Maybe it's in my blood. So let me share my favorite Halloween video with you.



Also check out the JAC members' posts!

Jewelry Art by Dawn
The Crafty Chimp
Cat's Wire

Ponder Palmer

"What are you doing there, Ponder?"
"I'm impersonating Laura Palmer, kind of."
"You are in the plastic I just tore off the new pillow, you mean."

"Wrapped in plastic. Laura Palmer. Twin Peaks."
"I know who Laura Palmer is and you only know it thanks to my Twin Peaks marathons."
"So why are you asking?"
"Shouldn't the question be since when you are a Twin Peaks fan?"
"There will be a sequel."
"I know. I know everything."
"No, you don't. Do I have to remind you of the moments when you don't get what I want from you?"
"I meant Twin Peaks everything, not universe everything."
"First, that's not true. Second, why did you have to ask me what I am doing then? Can't you tell?"

"Get out of that plastic. I don't have time watching you and I don't want to you become a dead Laura Palmer."
"That would be true method acting, though."
"And highly unpleasant for all of us."
"Yeah, well, that's true."
"How about a damn fine cup of coffee?"
"And cherry pie?"

Of course we didn't have coffee (tea is the choice of beverage in this house) or cherry pie, but I had kibbles, and that wasn't bad, either!

P.S. For people who worry about my safety ... there was no danger. Not only were there two big holes in the plastic, but Mom didn't let me out of sight for a second.

Pouty Ponder

"You ... laughed ... at ... me."
"I ... did ... not."
"Oh, now you are making fun of the way I speak, too?"
"I didn't laugh at you, and believe me, it wasn't easy."
"Well, thank you for nothing. It was your fault after all."
"My fault that you didn't notice you were on the edge of the bed?"
"I had been sleeping and you woke me because you needed to hold hands."
"You looked so adorable all stretched out like that!"
"I'm handsome in a manly, rugged way, you wanted to say. You make it sound as if I am still a kitten."
"You behave like one sometimes."
"Which gives you the right to laugh at me?"
"I did not laugh at you!"
"I could have hurt myself, you know. More vet bills for you, not talking about the huge guilt trip."
"My whole life is a guilt trip thanks to you guys. Ponder, you fell about 20 inch. Your butt was over the edge already. If you forget what a long and big cat you are, that is not my fault."
"After holding my paws you started rubbing my belly!"
"And you started stretching like Elastocat because you liked it. The only thing hurt is your pride."
"I can see you giggling."
"I'm not g...giggling. Oh, sweetie, you did look f...funny, though, when you sat there, all frozen up, staring at me."
"It was the Stare of Death. Unfortunately it didn't work, you *bleep bleep*."
"I had never seen that happen to you. The others, but not you. One moment on the bed, the next on the floor, and boy, it was loud. The neighbors probably thought there was an earthquake. A catquake."
"Eat my shorts."
"You don't wear shorts. Ponder? Ponder, where are you going? Pon, not the carpet! NOT the ... argh."

I always win in the end.

How I develop my designs

"Ponder, wake up. Do you want to blog today? It's time for the Jewelry Artisans Community blog carnival again."
"What's the topic?"
"How to develop your own designs."
"What designs of mine were you thinking of? My way of arranging your blankets or designing with kibble bags? How about the litterbox?"
"Your litterbox arrangements are the best. I like how you take the litter from the edges and turn it into a mountain in the middle."
"I do like that movie about the Englishman who went up a hill and came down from a mountain, you know. Pretty much the same thing, isn't it? Unfortunately my artwork is for the moment, thanks to you."
"Yes, I guess that's in the nature of litterboxes."
"You won't take a picture of it, will you?"
"No worries. So, anything else you got to offer?"
"I could throw up for you."
"Don't you dare!"
"I could make a completely new design for your carpet."
"Ponder!"
"I'm just kidding. What could I throw up? I'm starving again."
"Is that a subtle way of telling me you are hungry?"
"What a smart human you are."

Nice. First a snack and then another nap.

If you want to see what the JAC members have to say about the topic of the month, you can find them here. I doubt it will be as interesting as my litterbox art would have been, but do give them a chance.

Jewelry Art by Dawn
The Crafty Chimp
Bead Sophisticate 
Cat's Wire

My name is Stop It - A serious talk between cat and human

Seriously, some days I really feel that way.
I am singing the famous aria "I'm starving" from the cat opera "The Starving Cat" - stop it.
I am trying to surprise Meffi by reaching through the wooden bars of the chair she is lying on - stop it.
I am getting comfortable on Mom's arm while she is writing on the computer - stop it.
I am snuggling up to Mom during what she calls a heat wave - stop it.

Granted, she doesn't say it right away, but does it make it better that it's after the fifth attempt?

Now Meffi has the "Queen's Rights". I have never seen them written down anywhere, but it seems to me this virtual Book of Rights has become much heavier since Meffi got sick. She is allowed to do anything anywhere anytime.

"Ehem."
"Go away, Mom, you have your own blog."
"Ponder, you know that Meffi doesn't behave as crazy as you."
"Is it crazy to lie down on top of you?"
"You hardly ever lie down, you jump back and forth again and again, and although you are a wonderful jumper, you choose to stomp on my stomach, ribs or other delicate parts of my body. I won't even mention that you weigh more than twice as much as Meffi and that you are the size of a panther."
"Sheesh, and you keep telling me that I like to overact and exaggerate."
"A little panther."
"She shed on your stuff in the dryer. All you did was laugh and take a picture."
"I never told you to stop shedding and I laughed because she hasn't hidden there from me for a long time."
"You looked like a fool searching for her."
"I also look like a fool if I search for you."
"You never do. I could just disappear and you wouldn't even know."
"I don't search for you because you hardly ever hide. Your favorite place is the scratching ton or the cat tree's cave."
"She's getting special food."
"Which she doesn't like much. She'd rather eat what you have."
"I'll swap."
"No, you won't. She needs her special food because she is sick."
"Is that why you love her more?"
"I don't, Ponder. Remember when you were sick last time? I cared for you as well then."
"You kept putting stinky herbal cream on me!"
"Which was good for you."
"You took me to the vet's. I don't like going there."
"Everyone on the street and at the vet's could hear you. Maybe even creatures from other galaxies."
"So you don't love Meffi more than us others?"
"No, but she is still the Queen and has the Queen's Rights. You are my supervisor and my snuggle bug and my panther. Greebo is the crazy cow cat that sleeps on my head. Esme is the (not so) little princess."
"My name is not Stop It."
"I know. How about you try to be a little less crazy sometimes and I try not to tell you to stop it so often?"
"Deal. Can I lie on your arm now?"
"It's 5,000° out there. You will be glued to me, so the answer is no."
"I'll be on the ton if you are looking for me."
"Fine."
"Fine."
"Ponder?"
"Yes?"
"I love you, all of you, even though you do your best to drive me nuts."
"You already are."

P.S. The dryer does look kind of comfy, doesn't it? Perfect for my Queen. Don't tell her or Mom I said that. I have a reputation to lose.

Noooooooooooooooooo!

Have you wondered where I have been? Still around as always, as a matter of fact, but things have been a little hectic here.
Where should I start?

My darling Meffi is being tortured every day. She has had to spend too much time at the vet's lately, my poor girl. Thyroid, kidney, heart issues and Mom says she will dress up as a nurse because there are so many meds around. She also says it's good for Meffi what she does and no torture at all.
She - Meffi, not Mom - and Esme keep running if they suspect foul play. That woman is after them with meds, combs, and Meffi's substitute food when she has a no appetite day, a yucky looking brown fluid that Mom squirts into Meffi's mouth. Granted, Meffi used to lick it from a plate and Greebo always hoped there would be some left for him, but she broke the habit. Can't make it too easy for humans, can we?

I had to be dragged to the vet's myself, too. I had two spots, one on the belly, one under the chin and since they were not the first ones, they suspect I have the same problem as my sister. For now I got an injection and we'll see if that does it or if I have to go back again in four weeks.
Mom says for such a big cat I am being ridiculously wimpy. I just entertained everyone with my rendition of an old yodel classic. Why should I be afraid of a vet? Only because they have needles and poke me here and there and want to look down my throat? What a silly thought!

A post wouldn't be complete without pictures. You know how much we all love our scratching beds. We sleep in them, we scratch in them and we shed in them.

We are not the only ones who love them. Dina visited her neighbor Mulder a while ago and was convinced immediately by the comfort of corrugated cardboard!

Today Mom saw that one of ours is at the brink of total destruction. We try to pad it with hair as you can tell, but there's no doubt, this is a soon to be ex-cat bed.

Can you imagine her shock when she couldn't find it on the website anymore? I say if she is really the crafty lady she always pretends to be, she'd better get going and craft one herself!

Let's have some fun

Fun from a cat's point of view ... go sleep into the cat tree cave that you never ever used before and whose opening faces the wall and is obscured by a fat sisal rope. Let Mom run through the flat a few times calling for you, looking for you under armchairs, closets, the staircase, shelves and on top of all of those, too. Do not make a sound before she finally remembers the cave (the cat tree is in a corner) and reaches around to touch your fur. Only then you let out an annoyed sound.

Extra fun ... let her go watch TV and fall asleep, wake up again, fall asleep and choose the right moment when she's closing her eyes again just for a few seconds. Then sit right in front of her face when she opens them again and immediately pin her down with your massive chest.

This is a good day.

Love

You may remember that I always try to join in the blog carnival of Mom's forum, the Jewelry Artisans Community.
This month's theme is love. What comes to mind first of course is my love to Meffi, my Queen. I still haven't given up hope. Since she's on meds and feeling better again, she is much more patient with me, too. Who knows, maybe one day ...
I decided to dedicate this post to someone else, though. They were the true lovebirds in this house and although it stings a bit, I'll show you a picture of them, Meffi and Merlin who will never be forgotten.

Wanna see what humans have to say about love? Check it out here!

Bead Sophisticate
Jewelry Art by Dawn
Cat's Wire

Property

What's mine is mine, and what's yours is in fact mine as well.
Remember that, humans. You don't own anything. You are our bankers, our cleaning staff, our gardeners, our cooks, our entertainers.
You take care of our land, you buy our food from our money that we allow you to earn for us, you manage the things that we don't have time for because we have more important things to do.

Sadly Mom has still not understood this principle. "Move over, that's my spot in my bed, you can have the other side." "This is my sandwich and for once I want to eat it in peace! You don't even like this cheese." (Who is she to tell us what cheese we like or not? That's only going to make us sniff the piece she gives us after all and then leave.)
Today it was "This is my computer chair and I have to do things."
Let's take this from the beginning. Ever since Mephista The Wonderful is on drugs, ok, on meds, she's not the same anymore. Oh, she can still stand up to all of us and hiss and yell, but she has become more mellow and generous in her behavior. I have hope again that one day she'll be all mine. Sorry, I'm digressing. One of the changes is that she is turning into a regular lap cat. She had given that up many years ago, even before she got sick, so it was no small surprise to Mom to be honored with the presence of the Queen in her lap so often now. Both she and Meffi seem to enjoy it a lot. It would cut into my own computer time with Mom, but lately I have taken to sleep in a special spot on the bed. Gotta keep those humans on their toes and change habits from time to time, right?

Today Mom was packing up parcels. She's not the fastest horse in the stable, I can tell you that. Well, she got up to fetch something, turned back around and saw this.

"Meffi, this is my computer chair and I have to do things. You can sit on my lap."

"Is someone talking? I can't hear anyone."
"Meffi, seriously, move over just a little, so I can sit down."

"I can't even see anyone."
"Meffi!! Come on, time is running!!"

"Enough now, inferior human. You are about to cross a line here, and you might want to think before you really do it."

As I said, the Queen is a generous one now, however. After a while she gave in and graciously allowed Mom to sit in the chair where she has been stuck for about an hour now - her words, not mine, I think she should be overwhelmed by the honor - with Meffi in her lap.

Scratching bed reviews

First of all let me say that instead of getting a third bed - see my last post - we only have one now.
Although I naturally know who was the culprit, I just as naturally won't tell Mom who peed on the second bed. P-E-E-D. Oh yes, big time.
Mom was completely shocked because that's something not one of us four has ever done before. Or after. The bed didn't even last one day and she can't understand it as we really do like the other one. We scratch it, we sleep on it taking turns, not all the time, but often enough to make it worth the money it cost.
Cardboard and pee doesn't go well together, though, so the other one had to go.

Today we have our old pal Mulder here, however. Mulder got his bed soon after we got ours. Mom told me that at first he only sat on it, but then he found out he fit into there perfectly. Sorry for one picture being a bit blurry. I had to include it as it shows Mulder's eyes which got him the nickname "Moon eye" at the vet's (he can do even better than this).

Last time Mom was visiting Mulder's Mom aka her big sister she was told that the interest had worn off quickly. I guess my friend heard that because he decided to go back to his bed right there and then and stay in it. He probably overheard the plans of giving the bed to us if he didn't like it! ;-)
A cat after my own heart. Never do what they expect you to do.

We are four.

"Four, Mom. Not two."
"Yeah, I know. Why else would I need huge amounts of cat litter and food? Not talking about attention."
"You know, huh? So why did you buy TWO of those cat scratching beds?"
"I thought we'd give them a try first. What if you didn't like them?"
"We do like them. Three of us stood in front of two beds and had to fight for them."
"You didn't fight. You took turns."
"That's your version."
"And I stick to it."
"Don't. Only cat versions are the truth. And don't roll your eyes, it doesn't become you."

Actually he's not that wrong. I decided to get one more of those beds next time. Meffi prefers her own beds, so that's fine. Should have done it in the first place, right?
*EYEROLL* (There!)