Seriously, some days I really feel that way.
I am singing the famous aria "I'm starving" from the cat opera "The Starving Cat" - stop it.
I am trying to surprise Meffi by reaching through the wooden bars of the chair she is lying on - stop it.
I am getting comfortable on Mom's arm while she is writing on the computer - stop it.
I am snuggling up to Mom during what she calls a heat wave - stop it.
Granted, she doesn't say it right away, but does it make it better that it's after the fifth attempt?
Now Meffi has the "Queen's Rights". I have never seen them written down anywhere, but it seems to me this virtual Book of Rights has become much heavier since Meffi got sick. She is allowed to do anything anywhere anytime.
"Go away, Mom, you have your own blog."
"Ponder, you know that Meffi doesn't behave as crazy as you."
"Is it crazy to lie down on top of you?"
"You hardly ever lie down, you jump back and forth again and again, and although you are a wonderful jumper, you choose to stomp on my stomach, ribs or other delicate parts of my body. I won't even mention that you weigh more than twice as much as Meffi and that you are the size of a panther."
"Sheesh, and you keep telling me that I like to overact and exaggerate."
"A little panther."
"She shed on your stuff in the dryer. All you did was laugh and take a picture."
"I never told you to stop shedding and I laughed because she hasn't hidden there from me for a long time."
"You looked like a fool searching for her."
"I also look like a fool if I search for you."
"You never do. I could just disappear and you wouldn't even know."
"I don't search for you because you hardly ever hide. Your favorite place is the scratching ton or the cat tree's cave."
"She's getting special food."
"Which she doesn't like much. She'd rather eat what you have."
"No, you won't. She needs her special food because she is sick."
"Is that why you love her more?"
"I don't, Ponder. Remember when you were sick last time? I cared for you as well then."
"You kept putting stinky herbal cream on me!"
"Which was good for you."
"You took me to the vet's. I don't like going there."
"Everyone on the street and at the vet's could hear you. Maybe even creatures from other galaxies."
"So you don't love Meffi more than us others?"
"No, but she is still the Queen and has the Queen's Rights. You are my supervisor and my snuggle bug and my panther. Greebo is the crazy cow cat that sleeps on my head. Esme is the (not so) little princess."
"My name is not Stop It."
"I know. How about you try to be a little less crazy sometimes and I try not to tell you to stop it so often?"
"Deal. Can I lie on your arm now?"
"It's 5,000° out there. You will be glued to me, so the answer is no."
"I'll be on the ton if you are looking for me."
"I love you, all of you, even though you do your best to drive me nuts."
"You already are."
P.S. The dryer does look kind of comfy, doesn't it? Perfect for my Queen. Don't tell her or Mom I said that. I have a reputation to lose.